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College Toilet Bowls

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1 College Toilet Bowls on Sat Dec 22, 2012 7:53 am

AlainM3C

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Basherville Sheriff
Basherville Sheriff
Yes, it's bowl time again for America's college football teams! And you don't even need a winning record to be in one! Yep, in the old days there were only bowl games like the Orange, Cotton, Sugar, etc. reserved for teams that could actually play football and were good at it. But now, you can see a bowl named after a restaurant or a muffler shop and see a pathetic matchup between teams that could barely blow their noses right!
My pick for this years Toilet Classic:
BBVA Compass Bowl
University of Pittsburgh (6-6)
versus
University of Mississippi (6-6)

I don't know much about Mississippi's team except that their school is in Mississippi, a swampy state with lots of poisonous snakes and spiders that even the Confederacy wasn't sure it wanted. As for Pittsburgh, they are famous for only being able to keep coaches for maybe a year or less and for their players continually being arrested in or about P'burgh's South Side bars on charges ranging from assault to vomiting while intoxicated on police officers in public. It's a brilliant group of student/athletes (some of whom can actually read and communicate in short, simple sentences), most of whom purportedly study criminal justice from the inside out. The goal of their football players is to eventually find jobs in shoe stores like their hero, Al Bundy of 'Married, With Children'.


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2 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Sat Dec 22, 2012 5:44 pm

Pittsburgh IS the toilet bowl...heheheheheheehehehhehehehehehehehhe!!!!

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3 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Sun Dec 23, 2012 6:51 am

AlainM3C

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Basherville Sheriff
Basherville Sheriff
Now, that's just not true! Many of the houses don't even have toilet bowls. You just go out back and squat over a hole in the ground!

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4 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Sun Dec 23, 2012 6:44 pm

AlainM3C

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Basherville Sheriff
Basherville Sheriff
Speaking of toilet bowls, DB, the Steelers are now out of the playoffs. As a traiterous fan, I'm now supporting the Redskins. If they don't do well, I go for the 49er's. If that doesn't work, I'll use Seattle as a backup. After that, it'll come down to who's uniform I like best...

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5 Merry Christmas... on Sun Dec 23, 2012 6:53 pm

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6 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Tue Dec 25, 2012 7:06 am

AlainM3C

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Basherville Sheriff
Basherville Sheriff
Basher! That's just naughty! Shame on you! A nickle says Steelers beat Browns in the final game!

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7 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Wed Dec 26, 2012 12:41 am

Make it a dime and you have a bet!!!

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8 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Wed Dec 26, 2012 2:37 pm

AlainM3C

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Basherville Sheriff
Basherville Sheriff
A dime it is!

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9 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Tue Jan 01, 2013 7:43 am

AlainM3C

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Basherville Sheriff
Basherville Sheriff
Ya owe me a dime, DB! Or maybe a double or nothing bet on the playoffs?

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10 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Tue Jan 01, 2013 2:08 pm

Ok...who's in the playoffs?...The Browns and...???? Rolling Eyes

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11 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Wed Jan 02, 2013 6:36 am

AlainM3C

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Basherville Sheriff
Basherville Sheriff
Now that you mention it, I'm not sure who is in the playoffs!? I'll have to glance at the paper today!

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12 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Sun Jan 06, 2013 5:59 am

AlainM3C

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Basherville Sheriff
Basherville Sheriff
My pick for #1 college team this year: Notre Dame. I got some Irish ancestors in Ohio (near Rock Creek) and none in Alabama, so cheers for the giant leprechauns!

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13 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Sun Jan 06, 2013 10:23 am

Hey Alain...the hockey strike is over! Oh wait! So is Hockey season! lol!

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14 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Mon Jan 07, 2013 5:39 am

AlainM3C

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Basherville Sheriff
Basherville Sheriff
A pretty typical sports strike. The only people that got hurt from it were the fans and the businesses that depend on sports events for their revenue.

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15 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Thu Jan 10, 2013 5:50 am

AlainM3C

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Basherville Sheriff
Basherville Sheriff
It turns out that Notre Dame football players did win in one important catagory. 97% of their players graduate as compared with 75% for Alabama and 64% for Oregon. The biggest loser of the top 25: Oklahoma with a football player graduation rate of 47%.

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16 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Tue Dec 09, 2014 6:53 am

AlainM3C

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Basherville Sheriff
Basherville Sheriff
TOILET BOWLS FOR 2015

37 Bowl games. 74 teams. You really have to be bad not to get into one of these things. They even have the "Quick Lane Bowl" in Detroit. What the heck is that? A Bowl game for Bowling? But this year there's a twist. The ultimate toilet bowl turns out to be a winner for the team that has the worst record and yet still got into a bowl. Fresno State, with a losing record of 6-7, will face Rice (7-5) in the Hawaii Bowl. Neither team cares who wins. They don't even care if you watch the game. They're in Honolulu so after the game (and maybe before) they're all gonna be sipping tall drinks on the beach watching their tipsy coaches do a hula dance! Another toilet bowl that's a real bonus to the teams that got it: Western Kentucky (7-5) vs. Central Michigan (7-5) in the Bahamas Bowl. It doesn't rate as the ultimate toilet bowl since both teams have a winning (but marginal) record. Again, do you think they care? If they can make it off the beaches and/or out of the bars of Nassau, there may be a game of sorts. Look for lots of fumbles, laughter and plays like "Pina Colda Pass", "Rum Runner in the Backfield" and " Mai Tai has Untied My Shoe"!

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17 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Tue Dec 09, 2014 9:49 am

So, everyone has a chance to win a bowl!
I think The Bacon Bowl would be nice to win!

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18 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Wed Dec 10, 2014 5:26 am

AlainM3C

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Basherville Sheriff
Basherville Sheriff
A Bacon Bowl! Great idea! Now I'm thinking about breakfast.

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19 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Fri Jan 02, 2015 4:44 am

AlainM3C

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Basherville Sheriff
Basherville Sheriff
So now it comes down to Ohio State and Oregon. As usual, people will now be asking, "What is a Buckeye and how'd Oregon chose a duck for their mascot?"

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20 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Wed Dec 23, 2015 6:37 pm

AlainM3C

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Basherville Sheriff
Basherville Sheriff
I haven't even followed most of the bowl games this year. I'm choosing Navy over Pitt in The Military Bowl, though. And Iowa to win the Rose Bowl.

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21 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Sun Dec 27, 2015 12:33 am

Hydekelso

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Knight
Knight
HOw about the "BasherBowl (capital B).

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22 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Sun Dec 27, 2015 5:36 am

AlainM3C

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Basherville Sheriff
Basherville Sheriff
Good idea! What teams?

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23 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Sun Dec 27, 2015 5:40 am

AlainM3C

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Basherville Sheriff
Basherville Sheriff
Cleveland State versus Cuyahoga Community College!

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24 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Tue Dec 29, 2015 1:43 pm

AlainM3C

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Basherville Sheriff
Basherville Sheriff
I found this year's ultimate Toilet Bowl!

Minnesota verus Central Michigan in the "Quick Lane Bowl".

Both teams enter with a 5-7 losing record.

Minnesota wins 21 to 14.

Central Michigan now has a 5-8 losing record.
Minnesota now has a 6-7 losing record.

Now NCAA Football has a new low to aspire to.

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25 Re: College Toilet Bowls on Sun Jan 10, 2016 8:32 am

AlainM3C

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Basherville Sheriff
Basherville Sheriff
So finally Clemson versus Alabama for #1. Think I'll go for Clemson.

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